Monday, August 15, 2011

Is Age Really Just a Number?



        
The inspiration for this blog came from the dating site I'm a member of. Despite being very smitten with Mr. CT - I'm trying to "keep my options open" (as a friend so wisely recommended) and have not closed my profile. I'm not on the site searching through other people's pages, but am leaving mine up for others to contact me (I know this isn't the way to find a date but really I'm more interested in seeing what happens with Mr. CT than anything else at this point). 



Anyway. I've noticed that either mostly men over 40 are looking at my profile (you can see who has viewed you recently on this site) or there are only mostly over 40 men on this website.

Is it because by 40+ men don't feel the same pressure as younger men to conform and date "super model" looking woman? Is it because they're looking for a younger woman to make them feel young? Or is it just something about me that appeals to older men?

Not that I want to judge all older men based off my first-first date experience but I think that date showed me that there might be an age limit for me. Someone who hasn't experienced everything I've yet to (marriage/divorce, traveling, etc) or at least wants to do them again (i.e., have children).  I understand the benefits of the "older man" - ready to settle down, done with the "bachelor lifestyle", secure in job/finances....but I think for me ten years older is really my maximum. Anything over that and I start playing the mental "Are you closer to my age or my mother's?" game (fyi Mr. 1st 1st Date was closer to my mothers....eek)



On the reverse side I definitely feel that there is a limit to how young I could/would date. 

Yesterday I saw a 20 year old had viewed my profile. Now he didn't make contact but the first thing I thought when I saw his age (age mind you not profile/picture) was "Oh hell no!".

Mostly because my younger sister is only 20 and since I helped raise her after my parents divorced I some how can't get the Baby C's Age = Child (I still call her and her bf "The Kids")... which brings me to her boyfriend... he's 22 and I still don't think I could date someone that young. Sure they're old enough to go to the bars (where a 20 year old can't even do that!)... but I'd forever thing Mr. X = Same Age as Nick-Nick.

No thank you.

I think the youngest I could go... probably only a year or two younger than myself... or at least for now. I've been out of school for five years, have worked at a number of businesses and organizations as well as moved around a bit. Just like I don't want to be with someone who has experienced much more life than I have I don't want to be with someone who is still discovering who they are. (Not to say younger people haven't "lived" more than I).

However, as a general rule of thumb I don't (or at least try not to) prejudge based on age. I'll engage in conversation, reply to an email, but I can't help but wonder how much farther than a "hello" it will go.

What about you? How much older/younger have you dated?

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