Thursday, June 21, 2012

"Want to be my Girlfriend?"

Sounds sweet, old fashioned, something that should be followed with being pinned or given his letterman varsity jacket right after sharing a shake at the malt shop.



 Except when the question comes
only a DAY after meeting online!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes, you read that correctly. I was asked this morning (by a man I'd been emailing with - a total of four emails - through an online dating site) if I "wanted[ed] to be [his] girlfriend".... Um? NO!!

Aside from the fact that when I say "emailing" I mean me asking questions and getting misspelled one word answers in return.  How about the fact that I only know his first name? And that he traveled a lot as a kid. No deep, hours long conversations about values and priorities. No asking me anything about myself or my likes/dislikes. 

Yikes!! I mean I'm sure he meant well but it came off as creepy and naive. (and don't worry this person doesn't have my full name, identifying information or even my regular email address).

Aside from Mr. Moves-to-Fast; I think the sentiment was sweet. Officially asking if someone to be their special someone. These days this question doesn't seem to be asked anymore. Becoming boyfriend/girlfriend (or bf/bf or gf/gf or bf/gf/bf whatever) happens after a few dates and is usually more of a conversation about whether or not you're going to see other people. 

We no longer live in a time of courtship and woo-ing. What ever happened to sending a bouquet of flowers "just because"? Or opening doors? Or being wined and dined before trying to jump in the sack?

Is that really so much to ask?

It hasn't been that long since the (ex)BF and I broke up. And I'm not looking for a letterman jacket, promise ring kinda commitment just yet. But I am looking for someone who is willing to get to know me. Isn't just looking to get his kicks...or whatever it was Mr. Moves-to-Fast was wanting (my kidneys probably).


2 comments:

  1. Haha I love this post :) Also, your blog is very pretty!

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  2. I have been courted and wooed, but only once, and I must say I found it to be disconcerting (albeit absolutely lovely). It's definitely not the norm, and the fact I had trouble just accepting it saddens me. I think feminism has done a lot for us, but we now find ourselves in an age where chivalry appears to be all but dead and we bemoan it, but it's probably only dead because we spend decades banging on about being intellectually capable of opening the damned door ourselves. I wonder where the balance is because I must say I quite like having cake AND eating it! But I'm pretty sure the balance isn't in a man asking you to commit after a handful of half-arsed emails ;)

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