I know I've mentioned "Mr. NJ" a few times and promised I'd talk about him "later". Well here we go. A three part series on my new Mr. New Jersey.
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Mr. New Jersey (Part 1: Back Online)
The Ex and I have been broken up two months. While that may seem like too short a time to not only have started "dating" again but also to have found someone and be falling for that person.... I think the relationship between me and the Ex was over long before it was over. I think him coming out to visit during my birthday was a last attempt at desperation to make it work - didn't matter that it was the best weekend ever and we had an amazing time. Things just didn't get better but went right back to the same old routine.
Normally I have a rule that "an ex is an ex for a reason" and I broke that rule with the Ex. I said all along that I loved him too much not to try again, but in the end I think I should have known all along it wasn't going to work out. He wasn't what I needed or really in the end able to give me what I wanted. So it was and is time to move on.
I rejoined the online dating scene pretty quickly. I'm not one to go out to bars, clubs or ask a stranger at the grocery store if they'd like to get coffee sometime. In today's world unless you have a niche, a community you are a part if (or go to bars/etc) I really don't see how people meet/date. I don't see another way (if you don't have that niche) than online dating (that I and I suppose "set ups).
So there I was back online.
I started off only looking for guys who were in the PNW. I know my family and BFFs would prefer me to find someone local (in Portland) I figure Washingtonians wouldn't be too bad. I take the train up to visit my BFF in Seattle; no reason I couldn't squeeze a date or two in there next visit.
I'm just not attracted to non-smiling mug shot photos or the meth-addict-hillbilly look. I'm not interested in being someone's one night stand, jumping from "Hello" to "Want to be my girlfriend?" and I'm not looking to be your sugar momma. So finding a PNWer wasn't really happening.
I thought I'd spread my search to men on the Western Coast. Found one that lived not far from my home town in Southern California. We hit it off pretty well, had lots in common, talked every day all day for about a week ... but I was given the "Slow Fade" and he was gone.
Really? Fine. Time to open it up to the whole USA. There has to be someone, somewhere. You never know where you'll find Mr. Right - or at least Mr. Right Now. Right? A week later I get an email from a Southern California man transplanted to New Jersey.
Enter Mr. New Jersey.....
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Check back tomorrow for Part 2.