I am a Chia Pet

There it was.

 

Abnormally long.

 

At least half an inch

 

White and course.

 

Sticking out where it doesn't belong.

 

. . . A HAIR . . . IN. MY. EAR!!

Okay so it wasn't really "IN" my ear. It was more the side of my face near where sideburns would be (you know if I had sideburns) . . . but still it was a white hair coming out of a part of body I've never had hair before!

 

It's not like it's the first white hair I've found. I found three back on NYE 2012 in the "bangs" area of my hairline. Except for one moment of OMG I've been okay with those three . . . well there was once I plucked them all because they are shorter than the rest and were standing up like an Alfalfa cowlick.

 

Then there was today . . . today was full of bizarre and "welcome to your 30s" hair finds. 

 

Aside from this mysterious, and taunting, white hair in my ear (yea, yea. I know I said it wasn't IN my ear but it makes for a better story) . . . and discovering the three white hairs in my bangs have started having babies and have reproduced to four hairs.

 

I was sitting out in the beautiful sunshine, waiting for the bus to head home, applying lipstick when . . . . oh no . . .that's not peach fuzz on my upper lip . . . . that's . . . . OMG!!! Guess when I go in for an eye brow wax and the woman asks if I want my upper lip done too I shouldn't just dismiss her and say "no" like she's trying to get an extra $5. Apparently she's been seeing these tiny little black hairs sprouting. They may only be a few millimeters long but I still feel like the bearded lady at a side show attraction.

 

Yes. I am half Italian.

Yes. Even the women on the English/German side tweeze, pluck and wax.

But why? Why do I turn 30 and suddenly start sprouting hair

like a damn chia pet?

 

 

*sigh*